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Reading this book was a raw, eye-opening experience. It hits you right in the gut and shatters the myth that only a certain 'type' of person can find themselves in an abusive relationship. Kia Lee is a strong, accomplished woman, detailing a chilling journey through coercive control and physical assault. The narrative pulls you into the increasingly complex web of mental manipulation, making you feel, firsthand, the tightening grip of an abusive partner. It's not just a recount; it's a deep dive into the silent mechanics of abuse. Everyone should read this, not just to support survivors, but to truly understand them. Thank you Kia for having the strength to break the silence and the stereotype.
Paloma H.J.
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Kia's story is potent, raw, and startling. She is a woman whose life I, and I imagine many, can relate to in so many ways, and a woman aspirational in the strength and confidence she radiates. To hear and feel, through her vivid portrayal of events, how she became a victim—of both abuser and system—is to realize how we can all become victims in an instant, and of the deeply flawed systems that enable that abuse. Her story also spotlights powerfully the modern female experience: the strength, courage, and unshakeable confidence engendered by belief in equality, and the soul-crushing blow dealt by the systems and circumstances that shake that world view. I am so grateful to Kia for meeting the latter with fire, for sharing her story, advancing a critical dialogue, and igniting change.
Katie Tobias
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This book isn't just for people facing domestic violence – it's for everyone. Delving deep into the intricate nuances of abusive tendencies, it bestows invaluable insights that empower you to recognize and address such challenges. It also equips you with tools where you may be able to help a loved one who might find themselves in a similar situation. The author's inspiring journey from hardship to success shows us that we can overcome anything. Really empowering!
Lindsay
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What a raw insight into the survival and strength of a domestic violence survivor. Kia easily describes the pathological processes she experiences through her personal experience. Having personally been a survivor of abuse, the story and experience resonated with me. I very much appreciated Kia's bravery to expose the behaviors of perpetrators of intimate partner violence. The healing practices and resources described in the book can play a critical part in the road to recovery after experiencing such trauma.
M. Garza
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Kia Lee is an incredibly strong woman, yet she was still susceptible to such terrible abuse. She’s proof that this can happen to anyone who ignores the danger signs. Luckily, her strength and light helped her survive and share this important story so that we all might be better equipped to watch out and support those who need us.
Jason LaRoseCEO and Founder
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This memoir is a powerful story of a young woman living in NYC in her early 30s full of dreams and goals navigating life till she finally recognized and ended a history of unhealthy toxic relationships.
The story is told in detail how she finds herself in an unexpected isolated and very mentally, emotionally and physically abusive relationship.
She takes us on her very personal journey of discovering many of the root circumstances and situations in her past including being abandoned by her father and how not dealing with that pain and insecurity set her unknowingly down this destructive path.
The vivid descriptions of events and thought processes she shares, including ignoring her instincts and justifying the multitude of warning signs that in the end almost took her life is an important lesson for so many. Kia helps the reader have a clear Understanding of the early warning signs of Narcissism, domestic abuse and violence.
Her transformation through it all and courage to not only free herself and heal herself from a rock bottom abusive life threatening position she was in but also to openly share her painful story so that others can use this as a resource and example to avoid her mistakes.
The truth is, No one is coming to save us except ourselves. Through Kia’s experience she knows this all too well and her story illustrates the extreme difficulty of getting out and getting justice from a domestic abusive relationship.
Kia generously gives us all a front row seat of education and resources to get real clear early on of the type of circumstances, language, red flags and personality disorders to avoid at all cost.
Jodi TosiniCEO Unmessable INC
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First and foremost, I would like to extend my heartfelt gratitude to Kia for her remarkable courage in opening up and sharing her experiences with such vivid detail and insight. Her profound vulnerability and openness have not only inspired but also enlightened me and countless others who have faced similar life challenges. Kia's willingness to bear her soul offers a unique opportunity for us to better comprehend the harsh realities of abuse and control that many have endured, and it paves the way for healing. For this, I am truly thankful.
As someone who bore witness to the harrowing journey Kia recounts in her book, I can attest to the eye-opening experience of gaining a deeper understanding of what transpired. It serves as a poignant reminder that we can never truly fathom the complexities of someone else's life. This realization underscores the importance of approaching others with grace, patience, and forgiveness, particularly those we hold dear who may be silently suffering.
Prior to delving into this book, I had never given much thought to manipulation tactics, narcissism, or other such mechanisms of control. Kia's book, however, served as a profound source of enlightenment, shedding light on the darker facets of the human psyche. Through her shared experiences, I acquired a vastly improved comprehension of scenarios I had encountered in my own life. Kia's journey toward healing has not only been a personal triumph but has also played a pivotal role in aiding my own healing process.
I wholeheartedly encourage anyone with an interest in the topics of manipulation, narcissism, and other control techniques to read this book. Kia's narrative is a powerful resource for those seeking to better understand these subjects, and her unwavering openness and resilience make it a must-read for anyone hoping to embark on a similar journey of self-discovery and healing.
A. Morris
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Normally, I wouldn't walk into a bookstore or search Amazon for a book on domestic violence. I tend to lean towards the supernatural and horror. But to my surprise, the real horror was understanding the reality so many women face. We are the frogs thrown into the pot, while slowly the water heats. Many don't escape, as the author did. Often, women ignore or justify abuse, clinging to the "good side" of the people we love, holding onto those random moments, like in the book when the abuser goes pumpkin picking, warming up to Kia's Godson, or taking trips upstate as a family, with his daughter by their side. These little moments of time can be blinding, causing us to ignore the warning signs. Sometimes the opposite, we see the signs, but something from our past, like the author's childhood, spent starving for the love and attention of her father, can lead us to think it's us; we are the problem; we are just not enough. When we get uncomfortable, like boiling frogs, we maybe try to adjust positions, adapt to the changing environment, but eventually, it all becomes unbearable, and often there is no time to escape.
This book offers the reader some insight to the psychological nuances of domestic violence, why we permit it, how to identify it, and ultimately how to overcome through our own power, to heal ourselves and live and thrive in the life we deserve.
Erika Ferrentino
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Sometimes, we need to step into someone else’s world to truly grasp the complexities of our own. This unsettling account provides an unfiltered, honest portrayal of a heart-wrenching journey, a path illuminated by the author’s own blindness or denial to the escalating turmoil that loomed ahead in a profoundly harmful, manipulative, and abusive relationship, and the remarkable resilience and strength displayed throughout her realization and escape. The author’s bravery in sharing this story serves as a lifeline, offering hope and wisdom to those who might feel trapped in similar situations.
I share my heartfelt wish for you to find solace in the closure of this painful relationship and find hope in the promise of what the future holds for you, to bask in a life filled with love and kindness, and to recognize your inherent greatness. You are undeniably deserving of it.
We all deserve a life filled with serenity, surrounded by the warmth of kindness and love. This narrative reminds us that we can never fully comprehend the battles others are facing. The author’s candid exploration of her most challenging moments is a powerful testament to the human spirit.
Kimberly LaRose
